As far as my family and friends are concerned, Karena is somebody I met at the grief-counseling self-help group – I only ever went there once so I can say that I tried it. None of the people closest to me know that He’s not dead. Of course, pretending does not make my life easier. Then again, the distress it causes me helps to maintain the image of grieving widow.
Still, carrying this secret around with me, having no one I can talk to about it – it is getting harder. But I mustn’t allow myself to give into the urge to talk – every additional person who knows would be a danger to Him. And, I suspect, telling anyone would put them in danger, too. I mean, He has not disappeared for nothing, has He?